Transition Girl

Why transition girl?... Best answered by a quote from the Iliad....."The soul was not made to dwell in a thing; and when forced to it, there is no part of that soul but suffers violence."

Thursday, December 17, 2020

staying at home - random notes in times of existential threat (part 5) - real people!

I usually reserve my reflections on the year that has been to closer to New Year's eve. It's close enough now and I'm in a writing mood so will get it done while the thoughts are fresh in my mind.

Red eyes and a sore nose today are a distraction. A few hours in a park earlier in the week surrounded by grass and trees that I'm allergic to will take a few days to get out of my system. Practising safe social distancing to see my team in person for the first time since early March this year. Stepping away from the virtual interactions to something almost forgotten - a Christmas picnic.

The social interaction sparked a wonderful creative burst when I returned home afterwards. The best feeling in the world (for me) is when the characters of the stories I am writing come alive inside my head and I figure out what to do next in a story arc.

I also had the usual introvert response following any social gathering when I got home - utter exhaustion. It didn't matter though - because it was REALLY wonderful to see real people in technicolour 3D surrounded by the grassy knolls.

When asked how I've felt this year in the strange circumstances that have been 2020, on a person level, nothing describes it better than a quote from Sputnick Sweetheart's writer Murakami.

And the world around me - movie critics' Marge and Dave's review of 2020 was insightful - Margaret & David Review '2020' - YouTube - as usual they disagreed. A year of the absurd - one recently from the Tracys NSW contact tracers had me laughing and crying at the same time - Contact Tracys - YouTube - a new normal.

Nostaglia played a bigger role than usual in the year that has been, perhaps because there was more time for think music in the confines of home. Reconnecting with friends (even if only virtually) long located in faraway places over the year gone was definitely a highlight and an unexpected bonus in the year of solitary confinement spent overthinking the meaning of life. The philosophy schools guide (see below) was of assistance.

In the past, you could be reckful (considerate) as well as reckless. People were also gormful (careful); feckful (responsible), ruthful (compassionate), wieldy (agile), ept (adroit), and definitely gruntled. Maybe because I balanced the doomscrolling news with good news reading, I noticed more that we (mostly) brought back the lost positives in our approach to the circumstances. I was in awe at reading about the finer humanity moments. Made me wonder if there was a behavioural economics thesis topic to contemplate about the tragedy of the commons and whether existential threats threatening the lives of so many made a genuine difference to incentives.

I look back over the year that's been and there have been serious low-lights. The day job workload has been unsustainably heavy - effectively seven days a week since early March. Living alone made this all the harder, even with two super-smoochy cats to keep me company. Probably explains why I felt so overwhelmingly disappointed when the plans for the one tradition I was looking foward to (on the only three public holidays of the year I could rely on not being taken away from me) fell through.

I also look back over the year and realise that even in such challenging circumstances there were moments of joy. Many little things. From watching a bee floating into a Spring bright blooming flower to chuckling with friends virtually over the silly things we've discovered online over the course of the year. Mostly appreciating the hokum of it all. Perhaps I am more Absurdist than I dare to accept.

I am close to the copy-editing stage on the latest manuscript - doing some redraftign over the next few days to adjust for some beta-reader feedback. Working up the story-board for the next project - on track to start writing proper in early 2021. Part three (and final part) of the trilogy - the Peithosian Legacy. The time stuck at home has certainly given me more time to write.

The coming 2021 will be better. How's that for optimism.